21.5.08

Mets Quickly Crash To Earth

Mets Quickly Crash To Earth



Let's see, getting swept in a doubleheader by the Atlanta Braves not bad
enough for you?

How about losing to Tom Glavine in the opening game to really rub our noses in it and letting someone with hmmm, let's see, ZERO career victories beat the Mets in the twilight for an encore.

How about having Pedro wax poetic about an early retirement before
he's even returned from the bloody Disabled List?

Or Wandering Willie's bizarre and meandering comments about his management style and some sort of subtle racism alleged for not depicting him the way he would like to be portrayed as a swaggering hero with all the charm and brains of a beauty pageant contestant:


This guy just OOZES passion, doesn't he? Don't let them racists in the
media tell you different.

"Well, my players are watching the monitors in the bullpen going, 'Look at Skip, he's cursing us out.' That's not how I lead. But when the game is over, I'm [on them]. 'And why don't you turn over a couple of [food] spreads?' I've done that. You might not know it.
"Why [isn't] SNY shooting me when I'm ready to go down the dugout clapping my hands and patting guys on the butt, schooling them during the game? I'm on the top step every game. ... Why don't you show that side of me so people can say, 'Wow, jeez, Willie's fiery'? ... You watch any manager in baseball, you see him look like a bump on the log sitting there. They don't move, they don't talk. I'm as animated and as demonstrative and as involved and as intense as any manager in baseball."


Look at Skip, he's a douchebag who couldn't manage Nelson Figueroa's girls softball team.

How about wildly contemplative moments on the john? Why aren't they showing Willie holding his players' hands at birthday parties or driving an SUV covered in rose petals through a Macy's Day Parade crowd? He's as tough as nails this bastid, don't let those racist media chimps tell you different.

How come they don't show Willie smashing television sets and making everyone listen to Iggy Pop and The Stooges at ear-bloodying decibals in the lockerroom? Why don't they show him pinching Jose Reyes' bum and spitting sunflower seeds all over Aaron Heilman for being like the worst relief pitcher ever spawned?

"Is it racial? Huh? It smells a little bit."

Well Wandering Willie has finally cracked.

Worse than Figueroa blaming the girls softball cheers eminating from the Nats bench for his loss rather than his crap pitching, Willie's random accusation of racism blighting his public image is a classless gesture from a desperate man who knows his time is running thin.

And I want to see CCTV footage of Wandering Willie getting animated and turning over a couple of food spreads. You might not know it but once the cameras are turned off, Willie is a fucking animal. He turns over food spreads, discharges fire extinguishers when there is no fire, grows facial hair in a second-rate 1950s pimpish sort of way. Sometimes after losses he runs into that clubhouse and eviscerates players with his wit and charming anger management capacity. All whilst he's patting guys on the butt. That especially. Just in case anyone's feelings get hurt.

Well my feelings are officially hurt. The Mets lost a doubleheader and rolled over for the Braves like the obedient little dogs that they are.


Oh yeah, and let's have the ONLY guy on this team playing like he's a
baseball player rather than a spectator, get injured.

And as we already sensed, innately, knowing these Metsies as we do, they have extinguished the temporary feel good, two-game momentum joy ride against easily one of the crappiest Yankee teams in 17 years and are now staring at what might well be a new low for the season. Losing to Tom Glavine. Losing a doubleheader to the Braves, losing to Jorge Campillo in his first start since 2005. Losing, humiliating themselves, demonstrating a thrilling inability to rise to the occasion, maintain consistency or play baseball as if they meant it instead of as if they were afraid someone would find them out for who they really are.

No wonder Pedro wants to retire. Would you want to pitch for these Mets?

David Wright says the Mets have too much talent. We've got too much talent to be a .500 team. We've got too much talent to be mediocre the whole way through the season.''

Hahahaha. Prove it.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wiilie's tenure just seems more fragile by the day. His ridiculous comments don't really help him much.

I.M. Forme said...

i think this team is so bad that it is paradoxically removing willie from the hotseat. he'll still be shitcanned eventually, but there isnt a leader to be found in that clubhouse. Beltran just looks so tired from counting all that money.

Anonymous said...

omar collected this band of losers--let's not give him a pass. having said that, willie is a doofus--just not very smart--no command of the language--talks way faster than he thinks--and does not know how to use pitchers

Jaap said...

IMFM: indeed, no leaders in the clubhouse - imagine beltran making his bouyant announcement in Spring Training and now watch him barely capable of a well-timed hit. No leadership in clubhouse but none anywhere - this is an oarless ship guided by the tides.

Jaap said...

jdon indeed, Omar has collected this mess - yet at the same time, can you really complain that he signed Pedro and Johan? And who wasn't happy to have Delgado and Beltran before they became Mets? Hell, even the Milledge trade, so heavily panned, looks like a wise one, not to mention pantsing the O's to get Maine. Yes, there are personnel mistakes but frankly, there isn't alot he's done that in hindsight we wouldn't have done ourselves if we were the GM.