Archie Bunker's Army

After a long, bleak and dark winter Omar Minaya finally emerged with Prize, Johan Santana . Oh, Johan! And after a long, bleak and dark winter of worries that Omar would surrender the entirety of the Mets farm system for a shot at The Magic Mojohan , in the end, in the eyes of those in the know, Omar pants'd another GM . Well, perhaps this is a bit over the top. Outfielder prospect Carlos Gomez and righthanders Deolis Guerra , Philip Humber and Kevin Mulvey one might argue, represent the future of the Mets pitching staff and a potential All-Star outfielder but in reality, who the fuck cares about the future, we've got Johan Santana, the best pitcher in baseball now! According to Baseball America: "The two best prospects in the trade, Guerra and Gomez, come with high ceilings but also lack a lot of polish and have a long ways to go to reach their potential. The odds that they both will do so are slim. Guerra has an 89-94 mph fastball and a promising changeup and he’s o...

These kids will say anything these days to get past the doorman blocking entryway into the Gimme My Mets Fantasy Now Goddammit, Bring Me My Johan! Club . They will even pretend they know how to play to get my Magic Mojohan on. The Magic Mojohan So they pushed me up on stage and about a hundred tiny little Mets prospects, some of them even future pitching stars projected into the forever with every itchy trigger finger wondering whether or not they will burn out before they hit their prime, the future of the World for crissakes, the Mets World anyway, just waiting for their moment of truth, stepped up and handed me the multi-string Mojohan, the magic one, and I commenced to a playin' it, one foot stamping loudly on the hardwood floor of the stage, the smell of steroids and cigar smoke thick in the air, the laughter of baseball bimbos as they shadow danced with overweight, greasy fingered Moneyball addicts twitching in place as the attempted to look nonchalant in front of the baseba...

Belated New Years greetings, au fait readers... Still sleeping off the remnants of the beaten track yet the first thing I did upon returning home after a fortnight without newspapers and rumours or internet access was naturally to seek out all the breath-taking breaking news, the wheelings and dealings of Omar as he turned the Mets back from laughingstocks into serious contenders. The Answer Is: Glad I didn't hold my breath . Now, I'm not going to go all bitter and bile this time around. It's a new year and although there is no new perspective on the dithering and all-round lack of action from Omar , well, lack of productive action it should be clarified...anyway, no news is sometimes good news considering I might instead have come home to something like Mets Trade Heilman, F-Mart and The Peoples' Pelfrey To Philadelphia for Mike Lieberthal . So instead we can be comforted by notions such as Keeping An Eye On Joe Blanton . The only sentence of consequence I could pi...