Good Riddance, 2009

You could call the Mets 2009 season a nightmare.

But that would be giving the somnambulant front office more excuses to play with.

The Mets 2009 season was disgusting.

It was disgusting enough to scare yours truly off baseball for the last few months of the season. It was disgusting enough that the disgusting taste is still in our mouths, months later and judging by the fact that Omar is still the GM, Jerry is still the manager and the same heartless, injury-prone core is meant to carry the team despite all the times it failed so miserably in the past, Mets fans had better get used to the taste of shit because shit sandwiches are about all the Mets are going to be serving in 2010.

Can you really get excited about the signing of Jason Bay, the baseball GM equivalent of beans on toast?

Jason Bay would make a reasonable DH or maybe even a first base conversion but left field in the spacious ShittyField is a near-guarantee to a return of the Cosmic Baseball Fielding Clown we watched the Magical Murph master early last season. Losing by 10 runs? How about watching your kazillion dollar past-his-prime Chump Money crown jewel trip over his own feet and let fly balls hit him on the head for a little comic relief?

True, the Mets needed a hard-hitting left fielder but really, does Jason Bay fit this bill? A guy who didn't even seemed enthused about coming to the Mets? A guy who is already over 30? A strikeout king? A defensive liability? A guy whose numbers are bound to diminish in the confines of ShittyField?

Oh, Omar. You never fail to please.

Of course, Jason Bay doesn't play first base. He won't heal Reyes' desperate hammies, he can't keep Castillo's knees sewn together, he can't pitch a 7 or 8 inning gem and he can't manage.

All this means is that the Mets have another over-priced bound-to-be-injury-prone, shitty fielding, diminished batsman to add to their roster. Whoopeeee!

And compounding the sense of despair were Omar's other signings.

Kelvim Escobar, who missed nearly all of the last two seasons as K-Rod's potential set-up man?

Or better still, Ryota Igarashi for bullpen depth?

I mean is this meant to be comedy or sadism? It's Post Modern Omarism is what it is. Out of touch, out of focus and out of time.

And the best part of all this GM buffoonery from Omar is that the Mets still have no starting pitching to speak of unless you're happy to join the Delusional Club and hope Santana will be back to 100% health for 2010. And even if he is, that doesn't resolve the burnout of the pen when no other starter will log more than 5 innings in a start all season.

You want to get us excited Omar? Sign another dozen former starters (at least 38 years of age) who either haven't pitched or played professional baseball in at least two years or are coming off major reconstructive shoulder or elbow surgery.

Then we'll do some cartwheels.


And just when you thought the Mets were the gourmet chefs of the shit sandwiches, have a look at what these jackals are trying to do. Good luck with that one, greedy douchebags.


So as not to end on an entirely sour note, Mets-n-all, Happy New Year to everyone reading and here's hoping (perhaps unrealistically) 2010 will go better for the Mets than 2009, 2008, 2007, 2006, etc.!