Splish, Splash, Wagner Chooses Cash

Isn't it wonderful when all your dreams come true?

On the same day the Mets introduced the new-and-improved, no-longer-a-Met-hating-Marlin but a lover of all things New York Carlos Delgado power-slugger we so sorely needed, the flame-throwing closer we so sorely lacked last season announced he has chosen us to be his suitors.

For a cool $43 million over 4 years, Billy Wagner has joined the Mets and Delgado bringing us two for two on the "Oh please can we have a power-hitting first baseman and fireballing closer to end our woe and misery and nearly a decade and a half of Braves domination?"

Wagner of course, we figured we had in the bag - after all, the choice between Philly and New York hardly seems a fair comparison.

But to hear the soothing tones of a shaved-headed Mr Delgado saying all the right things, that he will stand for "God Bless America" and any bad feelings between him and Mets management lingering from last year's negotiations are over, that he did not have sex with that woman, etc., well, it was almost too good to be true.

And just when we thought the good news couldn't get any better, from outta nowhere comes the news that in addition to this good fortune, the Mets have acquired Tike Redman from the Pirates!

It was noted that Redman may be the left-handed-hitting complement to Xavier Nady, the TomAYto, to Nady's TomAHto -who is likely to be the Mets' right fielder against all left-handed and some right-handed pitchers.

It also means that unless we're stockpiling reserves to trade by the metric tonne for Manny Ramirez, Manny is not coming to Shea.

Let's all thank Omar for that. Even if Omar might need a little more convincing.