Welcome To Shitty Field

The good news is, Shitty Field, including "Taste of the City" features a 41 percent increase in concessions over Shea Stadium. The bad news is that, new home or not, new faces or not, it's the same shitty team of underachieving tossers being put out on the field, a psychic extension of futility that no food can possibly sate.

Where am I? Is this Shitty Field? Hey Sheffield, can you do THIS?

HEY! Anyone want to practise catching fly balls to the outfield for the next 24 hours straight? Maybe then somebody will catch them once in a while.

HEY! Anyone got a spare 365 days to count the build up of runners the Mets leave on base?

Can Reyes still out-run the cat?

Losing to San Diego in your ball park début, losing with former Mets Duaner Sanchez and Heath "Can You Find The Medicine Ball In My Belly" Bell getting the final six outs, losing with another fielding gaffe in the outfield, losing with a balk by Pedro Feliciano, losing with a lack of timely hitting, losing and giving up a homerun to the first batter ever to hit in a regular season game at Shitty Field, to Jody Gerut, of all people, losing with a pitching pig like Walter Silva facing you on the mound, losing with Jose Reyes getting thrown out at second in the third by Jody Gerut after overshooting the bag.

Did the cat get thrown out at second base as well?

Hey Jose, how about flying out with the bases loaded? Hey Mets, how about going 1 for 9 so far this season with the bases loaded?

Losing is still losing no matter how much you change the back drop.

The Mets have lost 4 of their last 5 games already and it's not even September!

Is the Mets bat boy auditioning for the Padres closer position?

You want to know how many happy moments there were for Mets fans at Shitty Field tonight? One. One moment to think the Mets weren't going to slink along at the loser pace they've been moving at for the last several years.

Couldn't they even find a clean jersey for Tom Seaver?! Sweet Jaysus, talk about cheap!

Anyway, I don't see the point in belabouring the point. Yes, it's a nice ball park, yes it's exciting to have Opening Night and yes, it still sucks being a Mets fan.


sanchez said...

this is the magical moment, Jaap. The Mets get all the losing out of the way early and then clean up in September...not.

I.M. Forme said...

i think Seaver threw his jersey in with some other wine-stained clothes and it came out looking like that.

jdon said...

seaver looked like he just pulled himself up off the barroom floor

Jaap said...

Mr Forme, how does Mr Seaver get such a portly figure just sipping wine anyway? Does he have a brewery on the side?

Jaap said...

not only did Seaver look like he'd pulled himself off the barroom floor but if you look closely, I think you see a syringe hanging out of the back of Piazza's trousers.

jdon said...

omar is shit and shit omar---that is all ye know and all ye need to know.

seaver should go back to his rubbish bin. reyes should be traded (for Halladay). not that they would take him. this team needs a BIG TIME hitter. Delgado and Beltran and Squeaky are not foundation players. I think the mets thought that the two pups were foundation type players. They are, if you are planning to be an also ran. And I think Omar "Mr. Job Security" Minaya would be happy with a perennial second/ I would rather have one BIG TIME offensive player than both Reyes and Wright. By BIG TIME I mean a guy who puts up slightly better numbers than Squeaky, but actually does something when it matters and talks like a man. As for Reyes, good-bye. He is too stupid to keep. He doesn't even know how to steal a base. His idea is to run as fast as he can. By septemer, he has lost a step and he is getting caught. when he gets on base in september, that is. Could you develop a technique, Jose? Ask the tortoise at 3B how to do it. His percentage is off the charts. Or Beltran, one of the best. Or speak to a coach? No. Not Jose "I gotts be me" Reyes. And of course no one ever makes you stand in the corner. I know it is sacrilege, but we have to get better cornerstones than Squeaky and Stupid.

Jaap said...

jdon, couldn't agree more about reyes. I was for offloading him during the winter, but these muppets have a real zeal for losing, these Wilpons. Remember when Freddy got all school girlish after meeting Art Howe for the first time? There is no cut-throat instinct for these muppets. Reyes should have been dumped long ago. Hell, if you scroll back to the beginning of my blog several years ago, I was advocating trading this guy. He isn't going anywhere though, these idiots have convinced themselves this is the only way forward, they're enamoured with the idea of developing Reyes and Wright as the foundations even when Reyes so clearly flawed in so many tragic and fundamental ways. They're stubborn in the dumbest way possible these Wilpons. New Yorkers should start a campaign to have them removed from ownership and let some huge Middle Eastern petrol consortium take them over and throw billions of pounds at them to solve any problem forward like they do in the English Premier League. Or not, just getting rid of the Wilpons would be all the fresh air this franchise needs. everything else would fall into place logically and without further damaging delays.

jdon said...

I don't see why Obama and his boys cannot step in. It is a failing company. The object of a baseball team should be to win it all. The Wilpons fail every year. People think we are crazy, Jaap. But I say it again--where was the Jose Reyes on the last 10 World Series winners. You can win one without him. You might not be able to win one with him. He is a tools player. Watch him---he is not a fluid fielder like a Rollins, or a fluid hitter like an Utley. He is mechanical. He has physical attributes which he applies mechanically to the game. No thanks, Jose.

jdon said...

P.S. I would describe him as robotic. But a dumb, annoying robot.

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