Nothing Like Victory
Dear Jesus H Christ,
Many thanks for the rollercoaster ride.
Yes, getting swept 4 straight by the Arkadelphia Swillies whilst I was away at an indisclosable location south of Zagreb, north of Split, east of Ljubliana and west of free hugs in Kiev, was indeed a funny joke - an optical illusion, almost.
If you thought I was going to panic, you were mistaken. Croatian birds are the fittest on Earth and not even four straight losses against The Team To Beat is enough of a distraction.
Aye, a tough choice but....not.
So thanks for getting all those losses out of the way so I could enjoy something delicious like The Mets crushing their archrival, Hillybilly Scumbags of the Universe by a decidedly lopsided 6-run margin...
Yes, victory is sweet, especially over the Braves....
What this means in the larger scheme of things of course is uncertain.
Was that really John Maine out there getting through his first pitching performance in a month that didn't involve a scatter-brained meltdown and 5 runs surrendered in an inning.
And what about Mr Not Having A Good Season But Always Dangerous hitting the three-titted woman over the centerfield wall and dispelling the rumours about the shift?
No, the Mets are not going to roll over and surrender the NL East that easy...
I just know some sadistic bastid is going to pinch me in the middle of reading the sportspage this morning and say aha! The Mets always win one out of three against the Braves, now the suspense as to which game of the three it will be is lost!
And as Friday night's game was, so is Saturday's.
It's the team's collective shit or get off the pot moment. And the Phillies are pounding on the outhouse door, their intestines in a twirl, waiting to take our place and release their bowels into first place.
So another victory to prove Friday night's was no fluke is necessary. And it should come within 24 hours, doctor's orders.
Otherwise the fit birds in Croatia are calling, Mr Met and they ent gowanna be calling for you.
Not unless Pedro really IS pitching on Monday.