Archie Bunker's Army

"We're a below-average team, period. That's all you can say," Jerry Manuel reflecting on the team he manages. Well, well. The cat is finally out of the bag. The dream stops here. All it took was a guy who'd been released by the Houston Astros, a guy whom the Mets had a suddenly started to rely upon as their 2nd best starter, coming apart at the seams against the suddenly first place Milwaukee Brewers. That and 19 hits surrendered. 11 by Nieve alone in less than four innings pitched. That and the three game sweep by the Yankees. That and the decimation of the batting order. That and dropping to third in the NL East. But let's be fair, the Mets milked as much out of Nieve as was probably possible. Three good starts. Against the Yankees, Rays and Cardinals in order. Next up? Whew, look out on the horizon and there's the Titanic, looking for icebergs; Oliver Perez . I like that Omar is "trying" to look for a deal . I mean, why should he a...

You'd think automatically that in most seasons, getting swept by your cross town rivals including a finale on national television and at the hands of Mariano Rivera making history ,you'd have hit the low point of the season. Does it even count as a MLB statistic considering it came against the Mets? Oh yeah, and before I forget, letting a guy like Chien-Ming Wang , a starter so bad he seems almost tailor-made for a Mets uniform, earn his first win of the season after getting absolutely shelled in every start he'd made prior to this all season. But when you're fielding a pathetic lineup involving a batting order oozing with mediocrity and inexperience due to injury, when you've already lost to these Yankees by a ridiculous 15-0 margin, the bar for humiliation has already been set pretty high. You almost want to see these Mets put down, just to put them out of their misery. It's like watching a half-team take on a full team, amateurs against professionals and whi...

Well now, that's an aggregate of 24-1 in the last two games. We've got the Yank-Mees right where we want them; cocky and over-confident. Just watch these Mets roll now! Yep, that's right, Mr Rocky Outing himself Innings Eater Pelf made it through five whole innings last night again, a lasting achievement for a bloke who has averaged almost precisely 5 innings per start this month. To his credit he wasn't abominable in for those 5 innings although it did take him some 93 pitches to make it before the ignominy of being replaced by Pat Misch in the 6th. The minor ignominy of course was being pinch hit for by Argenis Reyes which is like asking your cat to do your calculus homework. Pelf's ERA for June is a sparkling 6.39 demonstrating his growing experience in the Majors is having an impressive effect. Misch and Elmer Dessens , no shock, were wretched, combining for 3 earned runs and 3 walks over 2.2 innings to help bury the Mets deeper. I told these dumb bast...

The left field warning track got some serious work yesterday, first in the 2nd inning when Albert Pujols' fly ball died out there in the 2nd inning with the bases loaded and then again in the 9th when Yadier Molina's shot off a disconcerting Frankie Boy with two men on died to end the game. Both times, the Mets fragile hold on the game was saved. And if you think that was close, think about the 4th inning when Nick Evans , the proverbial lightening in a bottle since getting his chance back up from the minors, hit a two run double to give the Mets a lead they wouldn't relinquish. Had it not been for Chris Carpenter deflecting David Wright's certain double play grounder, the rally would never have had wind in its sails to begin with. F-Mart , showing zero proclivity at the plate, added at least two fielding gems out in centerfield which doesn't in its entirety redeem another O-fer outing which dropped his batting average down to .167, but at least partially jus...

Losing Carlos Beltran and gaining Elmer Dessens and Pat Misch is no way to go into a four game series against the well-managed St Louis Cardinals but that's what these miserable, snake-bitten Mets had to face last night. Alright for one, Omar waking up and bringing some fresh arms into the pen was a relief in and of itself although I can't say as I necessarily agree with the choice of who. Dessens has stumbled in his last few outings in Buffalo (try five earned runs in a total of 2 1/3 closer innings and you might come away unimpressed) and while he has big league experience, experience itself is not sufficient qualities. As for Misch, yeah, a guy with a 6.14 ERA in the minor leagues is not usually high on your list for promotion. But not if you're Omar, right? Now bringing Fmart back up straight away after he's obviously not ready, another smart move? Ok yes, Beltran sitting out until what is likely to be after the All Star game if not longer (let Reyes be yo...

You have to wonder about Jerry's bullpen acumen, using the same clowns over and over and over again. Or maybe you have to wonder if Omar is on fucking holiday. Maybe you can excuse his hands being tied by their own rubbish farm system in executing a trade for a decent bat or two to take some of the heat off of Wright and Beltran but this slow to the take sort of movement on hitters and pitchers is starting to make the Mets bleed more and more games. The bullpen sucks, they need help. How much more bloody obvious does it have to be? For about five minutes yesterday, the Mets could be happy. The rest of the time, a miserable foreshadowing to what remains a miserable season. Stokes came in for only an inning and then, after Scheider's happily unexpected three-run homer gave the Mets a slim one run lead, Jerry calls on Bobby Parnell to hold the lead in the 7th. Bobby Parnell has been crap lately, can't get any body out. So why is he out there trying to hold a one ru...

Well now, there's a shocker. Game on the line, one man on, two out, tying run at the plate and David Wright , the ice cold David Wright, not the red hot David Wright, swings at two consecutive dirt balls to strike out on three pitches and end the game. That's David Wright, Ice Ice Baby: Look at that ball. It's almost underground. One good thing, one relief, is seeing confirmation for 7 innings that perhaps Johan Santana isn't suffering from some mysterious ailment after all. Last night was vintage Johan and vintage Mets - Santana gave up only two earned runs over 7 innings and the Mets scored one run in support, just like the old days. Not good but better than 15-0 to your cross town rivals, you have to admit. New York, the new London? And where were the Mets tonight? Not at the plate, for certain. After the 3rd inning they went down without so much as a whimper until Beltran's single with two out in the 9th. And even that, as we know, stifled by David Wrig...

Hands together for Fernando Nieve . Two unexpected starts, two unexpectedly effective performances. Victories even. Good news what with Maine disappearing for longer than the front office had unrealistically expected. Another King of Obscurity rises to the challenge You have to admit, as much fun as it is propping up Omar as the punching bag for our collective frustrations, Nieve is another one of the occasional gems that surface stocking up the farm club with rejects and has-beens and nobody-wants-to-bes. He was plucked from obscurity but emerges not once, but twice to save the Mets after gutting performances with a brilliantly pitched victory. That's what an ace on the staff does. The ace will back out there today trying to prove he hasn't lost his stuff already. Big night for Mr Nowhere Man. As for Friday night's victory, led in part by Brian Schneider's unexpected three-run blast, which may be indicative that perhaps like Church and The Magical Murph , the d...

If the Mets were ever going to make a trade for first baseman Aubrey Huff they should have done so BEFORE this series. Huff had his second game-winning hit in a row last night, this time a bases loaded single in the bottom of the 9th off Frankie Boy and let's face it, if you can't rely on Frankie Boy, who CAN you rely on? And the sad part is that you have to spend time emphasising this is the first "legitimate" blown save of the season for Frankie Boy because this wasn't caused by Luis Castillo dropping a simple game-ending pop up. Hey Metsies, why not lose two of three to the bottom-dwelling Orioles? If Felix Pie is this happy there must be something seriously wrong in the world. After all, the fact that the Phillies were swept at home by the Blue Jays giving you a great opportunity to narrow their NL East lead shouldn't be taken advantage of. That should be ignored since you have no interest in climbing up in the standings. Now the Phillies are going t...

What can you say really? What do you expect from this team who have thus far had a lamentable June with no relief in sight? A victory on Tuesday, owed in large part to mistakes by their opponent translates into a loss on Wednesday when the opponent makes no errors, this time a 6-4 loss to the pathetic O's. A second victory in a row? Eeeeew? No, we don't want that! The usual conundrum of inexplicable malaise were the chief suspects; poor hitting in key moments and a brief but important breakdown when it mattered. You could also point out that Beltran and Wright were only 1 for 10 on the night which in most cases you can infer to mean the Mets were certain to lose. With the bases loaded and one out in the 6th and the O's bullpen on the ropes resulted only in a lone run to tie the game you knew the chance had been lost, especially considering that lone run was due to a walk, not a key hit. Even Obama's had enough The Mets of course lived to regret that when Pedro Fel...

While it didn't end as prettily as Big Pelf had set it up through the first five innings, he did, in the end, earn his first victory in over a month and the Mets, just barely, managed to defeat the Baltimore Orioles and momentarily ease the pain of that humiliating loss to the Yankees two days ago. Finally, a victory. Of course, you might point out that the Orioles lost this game every much as the Mets won it but given the state of the Mets these days, considering the number of victories they've given away themselves this season, it's nice for a change for the other side to be just that much more inept than you. The highlight of an otherwise snooze was the umpires 10 year conference on whether or not Melvin Mora swung at a ball that hit him in the hand. In the end, even hurt, he was called out on strikes, adding insult to injury, literally and after that, well, you knew which this game was going to swing. Or thought you did at least. Even the O's catcher got into the...

Well I don't know about the rest of you but once the carnage reached 9-0, that was it for me. Turned it off in disgust. Not just because the ace was getting bitch-slapped. Not just because it was the Yankees. Not just because it was less than two days after a sure victory was dropped by Castillo . But because of the disgust at the futility of watching. The Mets and colossal disappointment all over again. The season on a thread... And let's face it, most worrying of all, the final nail in the coffin on the 2009 season still hasn't been hammered; there's still the inevitability of Santana disappearing down the DL with a long or season-ending injury. That 6.50 ERA over the last six starts is no mirage rather a familiar set of circumstances; mysterious, horrific outings generally seem to lead directly to the DL for Mets pitchers this season. Not to mention the injury bug they've already experienced to date. This just seems like it will happen any day and you c...

After the sort of stupidity that lost the game on Friday night the Mets were probably one loss away from seeing the season slip through their fingers from seeing one act of stupidity too many finally break the proverbial camel's back. Nieve pitched the kind of Who The Hell Is He? game that the Mets usually see - instead, today it's the Yankees who apparently have a history of flailing against nobodies this season...sound familiar? But these Mets are, if anything, resilient and after Fernando Nieve's unexpected yet superb outing, they live another day to torture us. Of course it won't make up for all the stupid losses already gone this season, losses which will no doubt come back to haunt these Mets later in this season, especially if they end up missing out on the post season by two or three games, but for a day anyway, they showed resilience, they showed an unexpected grit and best of all, they showed this Yankee team once again for the paper lions that they are; a d...

Bottom of the 9th, two outs, two on, K-Rod against A-Rod , Subway Series, I mean jaysus, it couldn't get much better. A-Rod pops up, end of the ballgame. I mean, A-Rod threw his bat in anger, knowing he'd choked. Knowing he's A-Rod, Choking King, another failed effort. Or, pop up to Castillo who tries to catch it with one hand AND DROPS IT ! Game over. This is the Mets season in a nut shell. Pretty much everyone's reaction to the conclusion of the game the Yankees tried their best to give away to the Mets, mediocre starter, rubbish bullpen, lack of clutch hitting - the Mets just weren't interested in winning... "It's hard to believe," Yankees manager Joe Girardi said. "We kind of got a gift tonight." "I still don't believe it," A-Rod said. "I couldn't believe what I saw. I've never seen that before." When even A-Rod is making fun of you, it's truly a low point. In fact, it's the Mets franchis...

Alex Cora Fernando Martinez Angel Pagan Ramon Martinez

Well sadly, my booking agent has effed up my calendar and accordingly, I will be missing the Phillies series whilst in Paris. However, for those who cannot wait until my return for the Subway Series at week's end, you can find my most recent column on Flushing University sometime on Tuesday. Let's go Mets!

This was supposed to be the cream-puff portion of the June scheduling for the Mets. I mean for crissakes, the Pirates and the Nats.

You know the Mets are struggling when it takes 10 innings to dispose of the lowly Nats. On the other hand, at least they didn't lose. Quite a consolation prize. And I've come up with the idea that David Wright is the Ollie Perez of hitting. Just like the Jekyll and Hyde act of Good Ollie, Evil Ollie , Wright's absurd inconsistency; unbelievably hot, as in .500 on the road before finding a massive hole in his bat and now, back on the road again, it appears he may have discovered his bat again. Last night his two-run double in the 10th sealed it for them. Then again, when he tried to steal 3rd right after that hit, well, Jerry says he could have strangled Boy Blunder . ***** Do you care that Putz is now lost for the foreseeable months to elbow surgery? I mean, other than wondering who the Mets can find to blow leads in the later innings of games, of course. Were you impressed by Redding surviving the first 4 innings last night? Now we've got our answer for a 5th s...

"The reality of this is coming here to Pittsburgh and getting swept, me, I feel embarrassed, I don't think it's fun. I think we should find a way to play better and to focus more on what we need to accomplish." --Carlos Beltran, proving that in fact it was his own teammates making him sick these last three days, not some mystery not-swine flu. Mets fan tries to drown her sorrows as quickly as possible... Ok, my patience for making excuses for the Mets losing to the Pirates is officially exhausted now that the Mets have lost all three games to the Pirates that weren't mercifully rained out. I mean when the only way you can avoid a loss is praying for heavy downpours, your team has hit new lows. Huh? What's that? Nothing gets lower than the ass clown circus we saw in LA? Nothing more repulsive than losing a game because one of your players fails to touch third and another makes a child's error in the outfield before another throws the ballgame a hundred ...

Although he might whinge about the typical lack of run support from his teammates, truth be told, Johan Santana kind of lost this game on his own. D'oh! The uncharacteristic error didn't prove to be his downfall but might as well have I mean these were only the Pirates and staked to a 1-0 lead in the 5th, he promptly surrendered an inexplicable game-tying homerun to Jason Jaramillo , who had never hit a homerun before in his Major League career. And then compounded the problem, he had, by his own standards, a complete meltdown in the 6th surrendering a single, throwing a wild pitch and then allowing back-to-back doubles to give the Pirates what for the Mets is, an insurmountable two run lead. That was it in a nut shell. Eight singles by the Mets, another 0-fer night for David Wright , (2 for his last 22) another night another injury, this time a pinky dislocation to Ramon Martinez which entirely demonstrates the futility of this stretch for the Mets; the pinky injury came a...