Archie Bunker's Army

In a bizarre announcement the Mets decided yesterday to abandon their efforts to advance further in the Second Annual What If The Mets HADN'T Blown It Again fantasy playoffs. "The season is over," an anonymous team source reported exclusively to Archie Bunker's Army in the wee hours of the morning. "We now believe our participation in some sort of weird 'what if' scenario is actually counter productive to moving forward from the humiliation of a second consecutive September collapse," the anonymous source, head covered by a blue and orange balaklava, reitterated in terse tones. Later, the Qatar-based Arabic news channel, Al Jazeera , announced receipt of the audio tape purportedly from Mets third baseman David Wright . Portions were broadcast in which Wright bitterly denounced Archie Bunker's Army for furthering the myth that Ollie Perez was capable of the pitching performance alleged to have taken place in Game 3 of the Second Annual What...

For 7 1/2 tense innings the Mets and supporters at Shea finally had something other than Santana's knee injury to worry about. True enough, Oliver Perez , in a likely bid for big bucks, pitched last night as he never had before in a Mets uniform despite a pretty decent record against top opponents. A two-hit complete game shut out however, was in danger of being wasted until the decisive 8th. "Today, that was the real Ollie," Perez said, keeping the inflatable imposter stuffed in his battered suitcase. "If we can get Ollie to be consistent, which has been the dilemma for him his whole career, we will have an excellent pitcher, no question," Mets manager Jerry Manuel said. "Just don't tell Scott Boras that." Cubs starter Rich Harden was cruising along on his own, having allowed only a single to Ryan Church through seven innings. It looked for all the world like the game would come down to the pens, a thought that made Shea uneasy to say the l...

He carried the Mets to the brink five days ago following a brilliant 125 pitch outing with an even more heroic 3 hit shutout on only 3 days rest but last night in Game 2 of the Division Series, Johan Santana had finally shot his wad. Exiting the game for a pinch hitter in the 5th Santana had given up 4 earned runs, walking a career high 6 batters and worse still, complaining of left knee pain which is rumoured to be a possible torn meniscus. Pain was the name of the game last night "I was going for it," Santana said afterwards, clearly as dejected as the rest of his team. "We worked really hard between this start and the last one to make sure my arm, my legs, everything was in place. But this time, it was simply too much" The pain clearly effected his delivery, hence his difficulty finding the strike zone. The Cubs, desperate for a win, took advantage in the 2nd inning when a walk to Geovany Soto was followed by a Jim Edmonds double. With two outs and men on 2n...

Jerry Manuel prophesied after the Mets dramatic win on Sunday in the 9th inning over the Marlins that they were primed for "good things". Last night, for openers anyway, he was right. Mike Pelfrey , whose unexpected emergence solidified the rotation this season, opened a star-studded Wrigley Divisional Playoff by throwing 8 surprisingly solid innings, scattering 8 hits and a trio of walks to allow only a single run before exiting for a pinch hitter in the 9th with the score tied in his first-ever post season start. "Nervous? I vomited so much before the game I was almost dehydrated," the young staradmitted afterwards. The Cubs opened the scoring in this dramatic pither's duel when Mike Fontenot RBI single scored Derrek Lee in the bottom of the 6th for a 1-0 led. Although the Mets managed only 3 hits in the first 7 innings off of an uncharacteristically wild Ryan Dempster , who walked 7 on the night, after 7 innings of typically frustrating inability to capi...

Once again, in blissful ignorance, ABA presents the Second Annual What If The Mets HADN'T Blown It Again fantasy playoffs. Cautiously optimistic Tonight the Mets will open in Chicago at 6:30. Probable pitching matchups: Wednesday, October 1, 2008 6:30 p.m @ Chicago M. Pelfrey (13-11) v Dempster (17-6) Thursday, October 2, 2008 9:30 p.m @ Chicago J. Santana (16-7) v Zambrano (14-6) Saturday, October 4, 2008 6:00 a.m. @ Shea Perez (10-7) v Harden (10-2) Sunday, October 5, 2008 TBD @ Shea TBD v Lilly (17-9) Tuesday, October 7, 2008 TBD @ Chicago TBD v TBD Experts are picking the Cubs in 4. Tonight's rumoured lineup: Reyes ss Beltran cf Delgado 1b Wright 3b Murphy lf Martinez 2b Church rf Schneider c