Sunday Brunch: Fêted by Fetid Starting Pitching

Does throwing a baseball really require this much facial struggle?

John Maine continued work on his new Tim Redding Impersonation against the Braves yesterday. He has now given up 14 earned runs in 11 innings this Spring. Redding, in case you've forgotten, allowed 14 runs and five home runs in 2 1/3 innings, which included a stint against the University of Michigan before being "shut down".

You'd be thinking rightly that perhaps he should be working on his Mike Pelfrey Impersonation but it's Spring and the Spring has been full of little niggles and worries. There's still two or maybe three starts to ease the fears. Or two or three starts to increase the agony of recognition that Maine isn't ready. Maine says his slider isn't yet moving the way it needs to, and the velocity on his fastball is down a couple miles per hour because he is coming off off-season shoulder surgery. Maybe he will be joining Redding in the Weak Shoulder Sisterhood, or maybe he will experience a sudden, mysterious spike in the velocity on his fastball and magically work out his slider. Years of Mets experience tells me don't hold your breath on that one. You might not ever exhale again.

"Hopefully instead of some of these balls being hammered, they'll be hammered right at somebody." Maine says rather inconclusively. Hopefully?

Is that as in Ho Ho Hopefully, Mr Maine?


Get used to it, that look of frustrated incomprehension on Ollie's face.

Now that Jon Niese has been sent off on his unenviable journey to manhood in Buffalo, the other missing link to the starting rotation puzzle, Oliver Perez has also had his chance to romance us following the beating he took at the hands of Mexico manager Vinny Castillo.

I'm happy to report there were no demonstrable detrimental effects in his outing Friday against the Woes. He faced 11 batters and threw first-pitch strikes to only three of them. Right on schedule.

We can also report that Ollie is in mid-season cliché form after having noted with chilling precision, "Sometimes you throw fastballs right down the middle and they don't hit it. Sometimes they hit it."

And sometimes Ollie, you throw fastballs in places no one watching a baseball game would ever expect them to be thrown, innit?


It ent often, but I'm impressed. I mean this has sitcom potential written all over it. Not to mention that it's current (Tim Redding's "little baby shoulder"), controversial (get the woomp out of Let's Go Mets) and cutting edge (the Humidity on Pedro's curve ball Theory). Well done. (and thanks to Can't Stop The Bleeding for the tip...


Yessssss! I'm not the only one who thinks the WBC is a bogus event:

No, like everything else baseball does, this is all about money. Merchandizing money. So how many caps and T-shirts does baseball have to sell in China, Italy and the Netherlands to make this mission worth its while?
At the same time, Selig is turning a blind eye to the fact that the WBC is compromising the integrity of the real season. When Jerry Manuel opened spring training camp, the Mets' manager talked about putting an emphasis on instilling in his players all the elements and intricacies of playing baseball the right way - elements he obviously felt have been absent with this group the past couple of years. But what was the point with most of his regulars gone all spring?

And if you think we're all the bitterest bastids in baseball whingeing ad nauseam about the WBC, check out this guy, who says:

"Luis Sojo knows what the people want. Sending K-Rod out for a meaningless Non-save was it. In the Rain! Seriously, Fuck Luis Sojo. I hope Hugo Chavez shoves hot pokers up your ass..."

Well, now that we can thank the Koreans for kicking Venezuela out the door, by such an overwhelming margin that apparently not even Luis Sojo would call K-Rod in from the pen when he's losing by 8 runs.

Just be grateful there isn't a meaningless game for third place to tempt him.

*****Bits n Bobs*****

This interview with Jose Reyes is about as revealing as his baseball card. Jeez Jose, you don't like golf? Zzzzzzzz. Here's a few of the questions I'd have asked if I'd been able to submit a few questions:

Hey Jose, what's 2 plus 2?

Hey Jose, do you wear a jimmy-hat on the road? (thanks to IMFM for helping to break this lurid tale...)

Hey Jose, plan on hitting at least your weight this September?


On that highbrowed note, Johan Santana will take the mound against the Braves this afternoon against the Braves Jair Jurrjens, who is gunning to be their ace and thus a likely pain in the Mets arse this season.

What's the high/low prediction on homers Johan is going to surrender?

Shhhhh. Everyone stay positive!

And for all you mothers reading this, but only the wed ones, have a good Mothering Sunday.


jdon said...

I certainly do not think Maine is a lock for even 10 wins. He is a frustrating guy, and his lapses of concentration are inexcusable for an engineering major. Apparently, no pitching behavior is inexcusable for Ollie. And as far as Livan goes, maybe he gained 30 lbs and is hiding the ball better? I love the Reyes stuff,as I have grown to loathe this stupid, non-instinctive, overvalued baby who nonetheless could bring us a lot in return if traded by a competent GM. I do not buy the so-called value to the team. He is a loser who compiles impressive numbers. To me a great player is someone pitchers do not dispatch easily in clutch situations. His selfish and brainless approach to base stealing, for stats purposes only, usually leave him exhausted in September as well. His incessant showboating fire up moribund teams against us, and we all know how the Mets respond to fired up teams of any kind. I still say, name me the team that has won the WS in the past decade that needed a flashy goofball like Reyes to win. I think the WS can be in our team's future, once we rid ourselvves of Reyes and Omar "If I Only Had a Brain" Minaya. but, of course, a Wilpon is incapable of doing the right thing.

katherine said...

Too depressed about the WBC to make a baseball comment today.

But the videos you posted were a welcome distraction. First of all, "hopefully" the girlfriend of the guy in the red suit comes home soon, because the guy in the green sweatshirt knows nothing about ironing pants. Only a 20-something guy would imagine that that was a reasonable representation of pants-ironing.

I am full of admiration for the mother/son combo in the second video. And their living room - it's a masterpiece! I must find out, WHO is their decorator.

Jaap said...

well jdon, Johan seems in good form, thank god he didn't have Sojo managing him in the WBC or he'd probably blown out his elbow by now.
And Big Pelf looks ready, so that's two out of five.
And who knows, Livan might have regained his stuff, even if he hides his pitches in his rolls of fat, (maybe he's fat because he's such an "innings eater") so that's two and a half out of five.
Ollie, well, is Ollie but at least he can be counted on to shut down the Braves and Phillies so he's got some use, two and three quarters out of five.
Maine? I dunno, he's still recovering. Hopefully he discovers himself before he lands on the DL again.

Jaap said...

katherine, for you and you alone, I will say I'm sorry the USA lost, but I am glad we'll have Wright and Putz back in the fold.
As for the pants ironing, I believe the standard was set already by the Three Stooges, wasn't it?
see here: http://crackle.com/c/Funny/The_Three_3_Stooges_Six_Pants_Ironing_Board_Scen_/1680517

katherine said...

Thanks, jaap, that made me laugh! Took me back to the many hours of my childhood lost watching TV on Saturday mornings.

Now I lose the hours watching Mets games. So I guess nothing has really changed

jdon said...

jaap, I agree. But I hold out little hope for Maine--and none for Super Fatso. Two pitchers might get us third place---if we hit.

P.S. Notice-- no repeat mention of one Ollie Perez.

I LOVE YOU said...